Revise/Resubmit Requests

The forums at QueryTracker.net have recently had questions about what to do when an agent gets back to you suggesting changes and asking to see the manuscript again afterward. You haven't been rejected, but you're not being offered representation either. 

If this has happened to you, welcome to the Revise/Resubmit Request.

Receiving one of these is a positive sign: it means the agent thought your manuscript had enough promise not to reject it outright, but it still has quite a distance to go before the agent feels it's publishable. In a typical R/R, the agent will tell you exactly what problems s/he spotted, suggest a means of correcting those problems, and tell you to resubmit it after you're done revising.

If the agent only tells you the first part (the problems) that is not a R/R. It's a rejection with a reason attached. (You're still free to revise, but the agent isn't asking to see the result.)

The changes may be extensive. For example, my first R/R told me to remove two major characters, shift more scenes to the MC's job, build up the romance, and streamline the plot. This would require deleting 40,000 words, changing the timeline, and then re-writing to fill all the holes.

Let's say you receive a similar letter. What to do?

1) Think about it. Don't just scream or slam doors, but really think about what it would take to effect the suggested changes. Talk it out with someone who's familiar with your book. Think about how the changes would work with your own vision of the story.

2) Think about further changes that would be required because of that first set of changes.

3) Do not make any changes you do not fully understand.

4) Do not make any changes you do not agree with.

5) Do, on the other hand, give special attention to the places where you disagree with the agent's suggestion. If you find a better way to accomplish the same thing, use the better way.

For example, in my R/R I was told to remove two characters in order to streamline the story. Instead I removed one and downgraded the other from a major role to a minor role. This worked out because it retained this character's role in the B story, but it effectively removed him from the A story and allowed the romantic interest to do what he did best.

6) Take your time. Seriously, take as long as you need to, and then take longer. And then re-edit before you send it. Most agents would prefer you give the revision the full attention it requires than have you slap-dash some changes together. You're most likely not getting a second R/R from the same agent on the same manuscript, do get it all done right. And that leads to...

7) Carry the changes through fully. If the agent says one of your secondary characters feels stereotyped, then after you make sure that character is fully realized, double-check all the rest of your secondary characters to make sure they too are not cliched and flat. If the agent says to remove a specific info dump, then make sure all your expository lumps are broken down to a manageable size and distributed evenly through the text.

8) This is actually something that should be done between steps 1 and 2. Thank the agent. Ask any questions you have about the agent's comments, and then give a time-frame for how long you think it will take.  (Be generous with that time-frame, and don't give a date because you don't want to think of it as a deadline. The agent understands edits can take a long time.)

A revise/resubmit request can be a terrific opportunity not only to improve your story but also to show an agent how well you take criticism. It's a moment when you can demonstrate your dedication both to your craft and to your story. If you're given this chance, make the most of it, and good luck!

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Jane Lebak's novel The Guardian will be re-released this September by MuseItUp Publishing! She is also the author of Seven Archangels: Annihilation (Double-Edged Publishing, 2008) and The Boys Upstairs (MuseItUp, 2010). At Seven Angels, Four Kids, One Family, she blogs about what happens when a distracted daydreamer and a gamer geek attempt to raise four children. She is represented by the riveting Roseanne Wells of the Marianne Strong Literary Agency.

Publishing Pulse: 5/11/2012

Success Stories

Congratulations to our latest success story, Katherine Ernst!

If you've never checked out one of our success stories, they're a great way to learn about how other writers found agents on their way to publication. And, success stories like Katherine's usually include the author's successful query, so you can learn from those who did it right!

Around the Internet

How do you deal with reviews? Author Karen Witemeyer gives you some tips in Riding the Review Rollercoaster on Novel Rocket.

Rachelle Gardner is all about finding ideas this week. Her post, 9 Ways to Outwit Writer's Block, is accompanied by another guest post from Ms. Witemeyer, who has more good advice about finding ideas in There's Nothing New Under the Sun.

Ever tell yourself lies to make the editing go easier? Better check out 10 Lies You Might Tell Yourself While Editing and its companion post, 10 More Lies.

Is it email or e-mail? Web site or website? Online or on-line? Find out on The Urban Muse!

Want to get more out of your Facebook fan page? Check out these tips from ProBlogger!

If you have trouble with getting that story started, visit Write It Sideways to learn how to draw in your reader.

Have a great weekend and we'll see you next week!

Carolyn Kaufman, PsyD's book, THE WRITER'S GUIDE TO PSYCHOLOGY: How to Write Accurately About Psychological Disorders, Clinical Treatment, and Human Behavior helps writers avoid common misconceptions and inaccuracies and "get the psych right" in their stories. You can learn more about The Writer's Guide to Psychology, check out Dr. K's blog on Psychology Today, or follow her on Facebook or Google+! 

Character Connection

One of the most common reasons for rejecting a manuscript is when the agent or editor can’t connect with the main character. Sometimes this is subjective; other times it’s not. 

First you need a multi-dimensional, sympathetic character. Next you need to examine your Motivation Reaction Units (MRU). A Motivation can be an action, dialogue, or description that leads your character to react. For example, if you are walking toward your house and it explodes, the exploding house is the Motivation.  The Reaction is what YOU do in response.

The intensity of Reaction needs to match the intensity of the Motivation. If your house explodes, you’ll likely react with more than a mere shrug. If the Motivation is small and the Reaction is over the top, then you’ve got an issue with melodrama. 

Reaction can be action, dialogue, visceral reactions (e.g. heart rate), and/or inner dialogue. Visceral reactions (the body’s response that you can’t control) ALWAYS come first. The rest is up to you and your genre. But if you’re finding you are getting rejections because agents aren’t connecting with your character, you might want to examine your inner dialogue. It might not be enough. Remember, though, it needs to move the plot forward, not force it to sit still while your character contemplates the non-relevant. 

Read the following three versions of an excerpt from In the Dark of the Night by John Saul:

Version with no inner thoughts

“Guess what I have!” Ellen demanded. “You’re going to love it.” (Motivation)

Merrill’s eyes narrowed and she held out her hand. “Give.” (Reaction)

Version with most of the inner thoughts deleted

“Guess what I have!” Ellen demanded. “You’re going to love it.” (Motivation)

Merrill’s eyes narrowed as she ran through the possibilities, except that whatever it was was small enough to be held in one hand. (Reaction)

Merrill held out her hand. “Give.” (Reaction)

Version from the novel

“Guess what I have!” Ellen demanded. “You’re going to love it.” (Motivation)

Merrill’s eyes narrowed as she ran through the possibilities. With Ellen, everything was always wonderful, and everyone was always going to love everything, so she could be talking about almost anything. Except that whatever it was was small enough to be held in one hand. (Reaction)

Ellen Newell’s hands, of course, were larger than most, and stronger, too. Even though she was nowhere near her son’s size, she was just as good an athlete as Kent, and could still beat him at tennis without even breaking a sweat. If Ellen weren’t one of her best friends, Merrill knew she could have hated her. As it was, Merrill just held out her hand. “Give,” she said. (Reaction)

Do you see the difference?

HOMEWORK 

• Copy a scene from a story in the genre you write (preferably a book you love/admire) and highlight the inner thoughts. Do they move the story forward? Do they give you insight into the character and her goals? What do you like about them? What don’t you like? What do you notice about the amount of inner thoughts on a typical page (this is going to vary among genres)? Compare them to your writing. 

• Take a scene from your story and analyze each Motivation and subsequent Reaction. Is the reaction enough? Can you expand on it by combining more than one element (e.g. action and inner thought)?  What is your character thinking after the Motivation? Would it help your reader connect with your character if you wrote it down? (Write it down. You can go back later and trim if need be.) You’ll be surprise just how much you can strengthen the characterization by doing this exercise. Better yet, do it for the entire novel. Yes, it takes time, but it’s worth it if readers are struggling to connect with your character.

 

Stina Lindenblatt writes young adult novels. In her spare time, she’s a photographer and blogging addict, and can be found hanging out on her blog, Seeing Creative. 

 

Publishing Pulse for May 4th, 2012

 

Happy Star Wars Day from QueryTracker.net. 

May the 4th be with you!

New At QueryTracker:

Our website doesn't have any updates of awesomeness this week, but still make sure you double-check every agent's website or Publisher's Marketplace page before querying. Yes, it takes an extra few minutes. Yes, it's worth it.

If you're a QueryTracker premium member, then you can be notified whenever an agent or publisher is added or updates their profile.

Publishing News:

The Kindle Index, or how the entire ereader market is Apple's rounding error.

Meanwhile, Microsoft is investing $300million in Barnes & Noble's digital publishing.

Around the Blogosphere:

Jason Ashlock discusses how agents can begin thinking of themselves as business developers in a changing publishing field.

Check out Tolkien's ten tips for writers.

Janet Reid introduces a new agent at FinePrint Literary, Becky Vinter.

Kristin Nelson discusses why an agent won't take on any old thing just because it will sell.

Rachelle Gardner sends a message to a writer's Significant Other. (Good luck getting them to read it.)

Dystel and Goderich's blog encourages writers to send letters to the DOJ with their thoughts about the ebook pricing settlement.

Literary Quote of the Week:

What is wonderful about great literature is that it transforms the man who reads it 

towards the condition of the man who wrote. -E. M. Forster

That's all we have for now. Until next week, keep those queries flying!

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Jane Lebak is the author of The Guardian (Thomas Nelson, 1994), Seven Archangels: Annihilation (Double-Edged Publishing, 2008) and The Boys Upstairs (MuseItUp, 2010). At Seven Angels, Four Kids, One Family, she blogs about what happens when a distracted daydreamer and a gamer geek attempt to raise four children. She is represented by the riveting Roseanne Wells of the Marianne Strong Literary Agency. Also, she's got a teensie little announcement today at her weblog, so stop by to share the fun.

Headlines and Hooklines: Writing a Press Release

Yesterday morning I thought I'd do something nice for my book…so I sent out my press release to almost a dozen newspapers around my area, hoping someone will pick up my story and run with it.

I know this sounds a little intimidating to novice writers (and perhaps a few not-so-novice ones as well.) Press releases sound like terribly official and extremely elevated forms of publicity. Celebrities and experts and gala events get press releases…not us.

But did you ever try writing one? It's really not that bad—and it can do your book a world of good.

A press release is free publicity.

Reporters for media outlets love them because they provide content. You, as a writer, should love press releases because they tell the audience exactly what you want them to know.

Even if you don't need a press release yet, it's a good writing exercise. We've practiced writing log lines and queries and elevator pitches. With that practice came ease and familiarity with simmering our 90k word masterpiece into pure concentrated glory. Use this as another writing exercise so, when the time comes to finally make an announcement, you can rip out a press release and send it to your editor so fast her head will spin.

Exercises like these often help writers find new focus in their manuscripts, as well. Writing a press release provides a sort of goal for the work-in-progress—how you want your book to be viewed once it's released into the world.

A Press Release is NOT an Advertisement.

The key to writing an effective press release is to keep in mind who your target is: the journalist.

Weird, right? It's not necessarily the publication's audience. Just as a query letter is designed to snare the agent, a press release is meant to snare the journalist and get him to explore your story further. A press release is a huge billboard that says THERE'S A GREAT STORY HERE! and it lures all the news-hungry journalists over to see what's going on.

Advertisements are for customers, not for journalists. Journalists aren't looking to shop—they are looking to write articles for their publication.

Never exaggerate or hard-sell your book. Write the press release as if you are an objective reporter who found a news-worthy topic. Share an overview of the book and a general bit about the author. Keep it clean, keep it short, and keep it sharp. Don't give a journalist the excuse to skim or, worse, pass on it.

Anatomy of a Press Release

Traditionally, a press release has a few main sections: the headline, the lead paragraph, the body, the boilerplate, and the close.

Headline: the title of your press release. This is the eye-catcher, the sparkling summary, the hook. Write it as you would a hook sentence. Inspire curiosity and an intense need to read further. You can also add a subhead, which is in smaller type below the headline. It's another sentence or two providing more information—and more hooks. They aren't always included but since this is an exercise for some of you, go the distance for extra credit. Make those hooks sharp.

Lead Paragraph: This should be informative, nothing more. This is the spot for the who-what-where-when of the press release. If you're promoting fiction, you have a little wiggle room. Make it interesting but make it tight.

Body: Use this paragraph to elaborate and support your news. Provide examples and author quotes and remember: you are still trying to sell this story to a journalist so write like one. Keep it clean of adjectives and sales pitches and puffed-up claims.

Boilerplate: otherwise known as the biographical section. Write a bio for yourself, much the same way you'd write in an agent query letter. Say good things about yourself, your accomplishments, or your relevant qualifications. Direct the audience to a website or point to other resources that might elaborate on the subject of your book. Again, keep it short (but make it sweet.)

Close: Your contact information. That way a reporter knows who to call to get his next story.

Additional Essential Elements

The press release also has two more details to include in order to maintain proper structure. I'll list the parts we already discussed and slip in the missing lines in bold face.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Headline

Subhead

Lead

Body

Biography

# # #

Close

Release Information: generally written as "for immediate release" but can also be altered to fit your needs by writing, for instance, "for release after XXX date".

# # #: Tells the reporter this is where the printable text ends.

That's all there is to it, folks. Use this template to plug in your information and away you go. You and your book are newsworthy!

Helpful Tips

There's a few extra nuggets of wisdom to remember.

• Use your headline as your email's subject line.

• Keep it to one page-- 400 to 500 words is the sweet spot.

• Write it in third person.

• Research your target publications and tailor the release to keep it audience-specific.
• Keep it factual. You sell yourself by giving the facts and making them interesting. No one wants fluff unless they are shopping for pillows.

• Cast a wide net—approach newspapers, online news publications, and radio stations. Can you think of other places that might promote you by reporting about your book?

That's really all it takes to write a successful press release. It's a unique writing exercise that gives us the opportunity to create another effective marketing tool for our books. There is a world full of free press out there—and now you know how to grab some of it.

(Of course, that means also means assembling an entirely new list: publications, news editors, radio stations…and, lest we forget, a new group of data for our obsessing needs. After all, QT habits die hard.)

Ash Krafton is a speculative fiction writer who resides in the heart of the Pennsylvania coal region, where she keeps the book jacket for "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter" in a frame over her desk. Visit Ash's blog at www.ash-krafton.blogspot.com for news on her newly released urban fantasy "Bleeding Hearts: Book One of the Demimonde" (Pink Narcissus Press 2012).